I have long been a fan of the Canadian twin sister musical duo Tegan & Sara. In fact, our history is more long and convoluted, more passionate and committed than that of most relationships I've had. It makes it so that writing a blog post about them is an overwhelming task, to say the least.
But I'm going to attempt it, mainly because I want to address a problem I have. A problem with the lesbians, actually. A problem with the lesbians stealing Tegan & Sara all for themselves.
But let's not get ahead of ourselves. Maybe I should give you a little background history about my relationship with the Quin sisters. I was first introduced to the girls my sophomore year of high school. Fifteen years old. It was love, instantly. At the time, the name "Sarah" was a sort of inside joke among my close friends (we thought dumb things were funny then; we still kind of do), and so when my best friend stumbled across a youtube movie about a lesbian named Sara, he sent me a link:
The song, called "Creeping Out Sara" by NOFX, details, through the use of lewd lyrics and the employment of several derogatory lesbian stereotypes, lead singer Fat Mike's (fictionalized?) encounter backstage at a German music festival with Sara Quin. The situation proves an embarassing one for Fat Mike who (in my opinion) crudely attempts to hit on Sara before realizing just who he is speaking to and her lesbian identity.
While I could go on about the inanity of that particular satirical song, I won't (afterellen.com covered it pretty well for me, I think*), I can't hate entirely on what NOFX did, simply because, were it not for their idiocy, I may never have heard of Tegan & Sara myself. I find that an unlikely assertion, because I've been around the music world enough to feel like it's safe to say I would've found out about T&S eventually some other way. But I do think it's interesting to note that this right here is a real-life example of the mantra "any publicity is good publicity". Watching that stupid movie my sophomore year of high school ushered me into the world of Tegan & Sara, a world that would welcome me with open, alluring arms and never let me go. Seriously, T&S is like a drug to me, and no matter where I've been in my life, I haven't been able to get away from my intense love for these gay Candian girls.
But now I finally get to my point. Yes, we're talking about The L-Word (no, not love, and not the TV show either,) but the actual word. Lesbians. The lesbians have taken Tegan & Sara for themselves. And it's a problem.
This blog post is not and I repeat not meant to assert any sort of opinions or judgments on lesbians one way or the other. Gay culture is a hugely loaded topic and not one that I want to tackle at this time, for various personal reasons. The point at hand is the stigmas associated with listening to (and loving) T&S.
Now I'm someone who listens to a lot of different music, and a good deal of it is music more commonly associated with gay culture. What can I say? Lesbians have some good taste in music. So does it make me a lady-lover, because I love to listen to lady-lovers?
Absolutely not. But that doesn't mean it hasn't been challenging. Listening to Tegan & Sara, admitting they're my favorite band, has been something that has changed in meaning for me over the years. I have a problem with two of the reactions I've seen.
If you're a heterosexual and you love Tegan & Sara, the assumption is you must be closeted.
If you're a lesbian and you love Tegan & Sara, the assumption is that you're just fullfilling the lesbian stereotype and why don't you go find a new band, get a little bit original for a change, and not be just exactly like every other lesbian this side of the Atlantic.
Either way, you can't win.
It's frustrating to me, because Tegan & Sara's sexuality influences so much of their fan base. It either draws people in or pushes people away, and if you listen to them, that sends out a pretty definitive message about your sexuality in our culture's eyes.
What I want to know is why can't I just listen to Tegan & Sara because they make lovely music, because their lyrics speak to me in a profound way, and because I just like them? Why does it have to say something about me? Why does it have to mean that I'm either keeping a secret or subscribing to a cliche? Why can't it just be about what it is: music.
This may always be a losing battle. Tegan & Sara are pretty open about their sexuality and politically, they're very involved. I don't reprimand them for this; on the contrary, I appreciate their honesty. But it has made it so that they've developed a sort of cult-lesbian following, an ever-growing group of frighteningly obsessive she-stalkers. And it's a little unfortunate, that one can't listen to Tegan & Sara anymore (I've found) without incurring a million different judgments from different people, no matter whether you're gay or not.
I think it needs to be said that some of us just like T&S. We just think they're great, plain and simple, all sexual preferences aside. We may even just blow out the remaining $62 of our old bank account on a pre-order of their new tour DVD and included signed posters. Cause we may just really appreciate some good tunes and talented artists.
Can't we just leave it at that?
**On a side note, if you've never listened to Tegan & Sara before, look them up. They're one of those bands that's so very diverse, it's hard not to find something you can like about them. Or many things you can fall in love with about them.
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